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Alex: "Okay cinci you have to show up Pittsburgh and give us a more kick ass show!"
Jack: "Yeah because Ohio and Pennsylvania don't have ENOUGH problems with eachother.."
Alex: "I like to fuel the fire."

Jack: "Hey Alex."
Alex: "Yeah bro?"
Jack: "My Pants fell and I couldn't get them up."
Alex: "That's the same problem your mom had when
she was around me."
Jack: "My mom's dead you asshole. Any of you know
how to sing? We're looking for a new lead singer."

"Dreams don't always have to exist while the sun's down and your eyes are shut"
- Alex Gaskarth

"The closest friends you'll have are the ones you'd take a bullet for, but they're the ones you constantly feel you could put a bullet in as well."
- Alex Gaskarth

Alex: It's like the rings of Jupiter, an endless swirl of awesome!
(He's so silly.. Jupiter don't even have rings xD !)

"Money doesn't grow on trees but it does hang out in lakes"
- Alex Gaskarth

"It's easy to forget how to appreciate your front door when you're always walking through it"
- Alex Gaskarth

"They know better than to touch what they can't have, but faced with such infatuation, he is but a child in a candy shop"
- Alex Gaskarth

"Our street corners keep secrets, and our road signs only suggest, never deciding for us, never knowing if the destination to which they lead, is where we truely belong.
Life's greatest tragedy is not that it will some day end, but that most of us just live to follow directions, and many times we end up totally lost."
- Alex Gaskarth

"Be real, because a mask only fools people on the outside. Pretending to be someone you're not takes a toll on the real you, and the real you is more important than anyone else."
- Alex Gaskarth

"Human nature makes it easy to bicker like children, but the human heart makes it possible to squelch the noise our head creates."
- Alex Gaskarth

"I missed the moment when time collapsed and memory was erased, replaced by finicky social experiments, lost in the blur of intoxication, sucked through multi-colored bendy-straws"
- Alex Gaskarth

Alex: "Do you have to wait for the oven to heat up to put the tray in?"
Rian: "You can put it in whenever you want.."
Alex: "That's what sheeeee said."

Alex: Jack Barakat, what are your sentiments on this evening so far?
Jack: My sentiments? Doesn't that mean dirt?
Alex:No, your feelings, because you have none.
Jack:Oh I love dirt."

"Thank you for all the birthday wishes, it's brought a tear to my eye, and a boner to my pants."
- Jack Barakat

Alex: [to crowd] you guys make me have a boner. luckily i wore my protective cup today.
Jack: no, luckily you have a small dick so no one can see it.
Alex: that's also true, but i am still wearing my protective cup, size small.

Alex: this songs about one time when jack and i fell asleep on two different couches and we woke up on the same couch.
Jack: naked!

"It kinda looks as if her name wasn't Ellen Page, it'd be funny if you named one of your pages Ellen. This is the Ellen Page."
- Alex Gaskarth

Question: Did you have a positive high school experience?
Jack: No I was pregnant.

Question: Word association. Manwhore:
Jack: My mom.

Question: Favorite pick up line?
Jack: Do me.

"I'm not even on drugs.. I'm just weird"
- Alex Gaskarth

"Tragedy has struck.. We're out of peanut butter!"
- Alex Gaskarth

"I was at the bar connected to our hotel, drinking around 7:30. By 8:30 I was shitfaced. Not just wasted. Shitfaced. I passed out, only to be waken up by a lady screaming at me and I started just bawling! I thought I was lost! That I was kidnapped and butt raped! So I went up to the hotel room, and sat in the shower naked, puking and crying. So HELL YES TO UNDERAGED DRINKING!"
- Alex Gaskarth

"You miss the old All Time Low? What? What do you mean? We don't sound like ourselves? I think we sound a lot like ourselves. I mean, you can't expect people not to grow up. We're growing up very very slowly, keep that in mind."
- Alex Gaskarth

"I wanna tell everyone a quick story. So, I was with my buddy Jason.. and Jack. And we were, where were we, in Santa Monica place? So anyway, I was on the phone with my girlfriend, and Jason and Jack were in Jamba Juice, and I'm on the phone and I see this girl walk by in an All Time Low shirt. So, you know, I'm in there, and I'm just like, 'hey, nice shirt!' She kind of walks by me, and then she turns around and I'm like, 'Yeah! I got recognized!' She goes, 'Oh, you like All Time Low?' And I was like *sigh* 'Yeah, I do.' I was like, 'do you?' and she was like, 'Yeah, I love them!' And then she said something like have you ever seen them before, and I was like 'uh, just go in there, you'll recognize someone.' And she freaked out when she saw Jack.
So, I just want to let you guys of LA know that I really appreciate all of your concern, and I know you guys are looking out for me, and I really appreciate it."
- Rian Dawson

Alex: Can you say that again into the microphone?
Danny: I said 'stop moving, I can't get it in.'
Alex: That's what she said.

Jack: "I need a girl, or two or three or even four to come home with me tonight. Because all I have at home is a Matt Damon blow up doll. But if anyone knows the real Matt Damon you can bring him."
Alex: "If someone brings Matt Damon I'll come too."

Jack: "I think Alex's eyebrows are more popular than any of us."
Alex: "That's true. They are."

"The weather is really shitty outside. I didn't shave today. Because the weather is shitty. I don't know if that has any relevance but to me it does. So that's why I look like shit."
- Alex Gaskarth

"We decided that a good way to get to the front of the line much faster is to just rent a wheel chair and pretend that one of you is a .. Cripple."
- Alex Gaskarth

"Little man on a corner, somethin' pokin', it's his boner. But he don't got a big one, 'cause his name is Alex Gaskarth"
- Jack Barakat (singing)

"This is the song I wrote back in Nam when I was dealing with the stresses of the war."
- Alex Gaskarth

Alex: "Do you have a hickey on your neck, Jack? Jack has a hickey!"
Jack: "It's a razor burn!"
Alex: "Jack has a hickey! He's been hanging out with the cast of twilight too much."

"When Alex was sleeping last night I hit him in the face with my penis."
- Jack Barakat

"I am the kind of dude that would go to your seventh grade class and sit at the back of the classroom and stare at all your butts."
- Jack Barakat

"Wrestling is very similar to gay sex, but you don't have to wear condoms."
- Jack Barakat

"I'm going to play you a song that I wrote about Lady Gaga's vagina."
- Alex Gaskarth

"The day Blink-182 announced their hiatus, I felt as if a part of me died."
- Alex Gaskarth

"Always look for your lost ones in trashcans."
- Alex Gaskarth

"This song is about the feeling you get when you meet a puppy for the first time and you try to convince your parents to let you take it home, and they say no. And you're torn away from that puppy. And it's fucking bullshit."
- Alex Gaskarth (discussing Remembering Sunday)

"I've got Jelly Babies, and I've got Fruit Pastilles, and if anybody wants some that's too bad because I'm not fucking sharing."
- Alex Gaskarth

"My potential is limitless, but the day is holding me back."
- Alex Gaskarth

"Give it up for the process that leads to childbirth!"
- Alex Gaskarth

"My band hates it when I say this, but we're not Paramore, so fuck it! I'm drunk as shit right now!"
- Alex Gaskarth

"I'd rather be in Hufflepuff, bro. At least then I could be gay OPENLY. I wouldn't have to hide it!"
- Alex Gaskarth

"We're in foggy Londontown! It's magnificent, it's bloody brilliant!"
- Jack Barakat (In an English accent)

"Therapy is about every kid's nightmare. When people are telling you that you need to get help, but all you really want is a hug."
- Alex Gaskarth (discussing Therapy)

"Don't kill yourselves. Have sex instead."
- Alex Gaskarth
So I posted almost all my favourite ATL quotes. This took me about 2 hours to make, but it's all worth it!

Many of the quotes are from blogs, others from shows and interviews :)

Please leave a comment! Feel free to add your favourite quotes!
Cora100 Featured By Owner Sep 16, 2013
these are the best.

MadamRazor Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2012  Hobbyist Writer

emopuppy2012 Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2011  Student Writer
i just LOVE all of these! soo funny!
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